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Thread: [RK2] IRRK: Festive Cheer in Newland City

  1. #1
    Independent Reporters of Rubi-Ka Editor: IRRK's Avatar

    [RK2] IRRK: Festive Cheer in Newland City

    Festive Cheer in Newland City
    December 31, 29481 - Brad Talamer [Rimor]

    IRRK - With the season to be jolly upon us, many have been celebrating in cities across Rubi-Ka. As part of IRRK's coverage over the festive period, we took a trip to Newland for one of the largest seasonal celebrations on the planet.


    It was only a couple of weeks ago that the Newland Council were busy with Omni-HQ about the small matter of ID chips, so it would've been excusable for the city to revel in calm silence over the holidays. However, no one seemed to tell its residents that - With little time to breath, some quick organisation let the festive cheer spill onto the city streets for all sides to enjoy.

    "With Adam Roycraft Day going so well," explained Minister Beta "Foosball33" Cross, "We talked about holding more parties and such. Christmas was the next big holiday." Dressed in interesting party wear, the city's Foreign Minister noted the party's organisation being led by Newland's ministers, including Meissa Rhode ("Ninnyhammer"), Trixie Rhaiyne ("Tryqz") and Rachelle Caris ("Riawn"). The minister also credited the contributions of Pennelope "Tinkerbots" Hollister as a muse for the organisers - "She got the Santa and singing leets, plus she told everyone on the planet about it I think. If you're going to plan a party, who better to help you." Cross finished off with an apology to those who couldn't make it to the party, expressing holiday wishes and hope that they'll be able to make next year's celebrations.

    The celebrations themselves resembled a small Who's Who of the city, with noted engineer Harland "Retoolkit" Bregetty, self-promoting technoscavenger Buckehead, and organisations such as Lumen Orien, Shattered Dreams, Society of Ancients and Gridstream Productions among those in attendance. The last in the list seemed to be impressed with the crowd numbers, with the night's resident DJ having a very visible reaction. "I am ecstatic at the turnout," exclaimed Gridstream DJ Dynamiks. "Rubi-Ka has proven once again that they love to party!"

    When you come to a party marking such an occasion, you expect to have seen it all before - What you don't expect to see is small furry rodents belting out winter classics. Previously unknown, the Karoling Leets became one of the surprise highlights of the event. Wearing identical santa sats and using the nearby Bronto Burger stand as a stage, the minature quartet of Karoleet, Carlnar, Miches & Sloompy led multiple performances of the song 'Jingle Bells' throughout the night: "Jingl BellZ Jingl BellZ Jingl awl da wey. Ohhhhhs! whatz Funz t`iz raid inza won-horz owp`n sley." You get the idea. In between performances, the leets went through the crowd, searching for cookies to munch on while being continuously petted.

    For those looking for something a little less...organic, stomps were often heard coming from the loudspeakered Buckehead. The self-proclaimed "Hero of Borealis" provided a slightly more caustic (although not entirely intended) comic relief, retelling stories of how he had single-handedly saved the city "and some orphans", almost forgetting that the majority of last week's Kyr'ozch invasion was repelled by Retoolkit's infamous robot army. After referring to everyone in close proximity as "meatbags", the technoscavanger took questions from the crowd with some amusing responses - A question from Omni-Reform's Corporal "Kaydemp" about where his Off switch is was met with the deadpan reply of "where [her] sense of dignity is - Gone." The robot later offered to sing with the Karoling Leets, noting his knowledge of "154.8 drinking songs". Luckily, most people passed on the offer.

    Another warm highlight was the presence of its own dedicated Santa, played by Papai "Sankt" Noel. Taking the spirit of the holidays to heart, the city's temporary Father Christmas spent a considerable amount of time bludgeoning wild Santa Leets around the surrounding desert to acquire enough to hand out to those present at the party. Assumed to have been using an anonymous identity, Sankt spent the majority of the time playing the role of Santa Claus, talking individually with many of the crowd about Christmas around his own small grotto near the front of the crowd. "Sometimes the thought of being at your best behaviour, is just as important as being good itself," explained 'Sankt Nick', "So this year, I'm giving it my all as well." We may never know who the guy behind the beard truly was, but it did bring more of a touching character to the event with praise from many in attendance.

    Originally expected to end after two hours, the celebrations lasted for twice as long before everyone started to disperse. While many decided to leave the festivities on a tired high, many resumed the next night with an after show party at the apartment of one Newland minister. The minister in question shall remain nameless, but shirtless as well.

    These holidays will mean something different to each person, and for some it may not mean anything at all. Regardless, the party in Newland, as well as the many taking place around the planet, has shown how much it means to all. Although this reporter cannot really say what it means, or even admit to being 'good' (if there is such a thing), those words of Sankt will be remembered:

    "Sometimes the thought of being at your best behaviour, is just as important as being good itself."

    I doubt I'll be getting that scandal of a young Jessica Lonare in a college wet-shirt contest, but I'll still hope - Sometimes scoops like these really do come out of thin air!


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  2. #2
    Quote Originally Posted by Editor: IRRK View Post
    I doubt I'll be getting that scandal of a young Jessica Lonare in a college wet-shirt contest, but I'll still hope - Sometimes scoops like these really do come out of thin air!
    But that doesn't mean you should stop trying!
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  3. #3
    Ummm, thanks for getting my good side Brad.

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