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Thread: The Religion of Funcom (Care of 14.7.8 items...) ;-)

  1. #1

    The Religion of Funcom (Care of 14.7.8 items...) ;-)

    This is just a compilation of all the new religious-esque descriptions of items in 14.7.8... Just a fun read..

    ...abandon Him, though the Unbeliever try and trick us with words. They say that He is false, but we know that He is the Truth. They say that He tricks us and is evil, but we know that He loves us and is Good. The Unbeliever speaks only lies. Do not listen to the Unbeliever. Only the Immortal One knows Truth, and he shares that Truth with us...
    ...and at the front of the burning legions was Hezak, his sword cleaving the light...
    ...and from their midst the Immortal One chose the blessed Khalum. Great were his trials and anguish...
    ...and Khalum trod the path of the Immortal One and was reborn... now no man may suffer the sight of Khalum, for his blazing sour burns the Unclean..."
    ...and from their midst the Immortal One chose the blessed Khalum. Great were his trials and anguish... ...and Khalum trod the path of the Immortal One and was reborn... now no man may suffer the sight of Khalum, for his blazing sour burns the Unclean...
    ...and He shall be returned to His throne in Paradise. Great shall be the celebrations of the Faithful on that glorious day. And great shall be the wailing of the Unbeliever on that day...
    ...and he shall be triumphant, leaving behind a dead world...
    ...and He shall say, 'It is I, Hezak. I have returned.' And the barred gates of Paradise shall be shattered by his wrath, and His enemies will know terror. For His return seals their doom. Mighty shall be His vengeance upon those who caused his exile. To the last will they be hunted, and none shall offer them refuge. For the Immortal One has returned to power...
    ...and he wept over the coffin of Dominus Nathaniel, for even with his great healing powers, then-Preceptor Jeuru could not defeat time itself. And so, the First, the bringer of knowledge, Nathaniel, was dead. Little did we know that, even in death, beloved Nathaniel would continue to guide us, and from his place in Paradise send the Immortal One to lead and deliver us...
    ...and into the void of unknowning shall you be returned...
    ...and out of the cleansing fire he emerged unscathed...
    ...and those on His right hand groveled for mercy. The glorious Khalum was privileged to be given the task of scourging the Unbeliever. Their screams filled the night, and the Immortal One was pleased...
    ...and we shall strike the Unbeliever down. For those that do not Believe do not deserve life...
    ...and with the coming of the final darkness will the Unbeliever know their error. Their Disbelief has earned them an endless punishment. They shall never know the beauty that is the Immortal One's love. They shall never share in the Immortal One's wisdom. They shall be fed into the fire and left to burn for all eternity...
    ...at His bidding the Power flows into us...The blessing of the Immortal One is upon you.
    ...at his touch the Mighty are humbled...
    ...at his touch the wicked are chastened...
    ...by His grace we shall Triumph. His anger shall seal their Doom...
    ...His Words fulfill us. His Presence awes us. His Knowledge humbles us. With Him we are Complete...
    ...by the screams of the Unbeliever is he renewed...
    ...created to carry out the will of the Immortal One. Through the ranks of the Unbeliever we shall move, creating a river of blood as we go. Towards the gates of Paradise we will bring Him, and He shall say...
    ...from ages past we come, obeying the Immortal One. Death but strengthens our binds to Him, for we are His forever...
    ...from ages past we come, obeying the Immortal One. Death shall not break our Promise, nor stop our return...
    ...from the burning past He appeared, bringing the Promise of a mighty Future. The Faithful were given a glimpse of Paradise, and the power was promised them...
    ...from the depths of His hatred shall our purpose emerge...
    ...from their bones shall His throne be made. The anguished screams of the Unbeliever shall be His choir as He presides over Paradise...
    ...he calls upon the Power by reaching through the darkness...
    ...He controls the dark. In His hands, the dark is a living thing, bent to His will...
    ...He has many enemies, for they are jealous of His power; jealous that He has come and shown us the path back to Paradise; jealous that He has shown us the power that is available for those in Paradise that are willing to take it. But we shall return to Paradise, and take the power that is ours by right. We will crush His enemies, and He shall rule over Paradise. And we shall be the first amongst His chosen, for He loves us...
    ...His breath gives renewed life to the True and blights the Unbeliever...
    ...His presence sings to us, soothes us, embraces us. He is our life, our death. We shall follow Him forever, for even death is no barrier to Him. We are not diminished by death, but shall rise again to realize His return to Paradise...
    ...his touch sanctifies the True and destroys the Unbeliever...
    ...his voice inspired them with hope. His words inflamed their passions. The Heavens themselves were cowed by his Righteousness...
    ...in their jealousy they Abandoned us. Only He returned from Exile to lead us to Paradise and reclaim what we lost. On the Day we shall be risen up..."
    ...his voice whispered to us in the Past. His words caress our ears in the Present. Our angelic host shall sing his glory in the Future...
    ...I have been given a glimpse of the dark, and am humbled. It is Power. Chaos. Desire. Fulfillment. Life. Death. Pain. Joy. It is Everything. My bretheren no longer understand my words, for they have not been given this gift. I am changed forever...
    ...in His presence the stars themselves do tremble. His might knows no bounds. His rage knows no limits. His enmity is unfathomable...
    ...in his presence the Wretched are blind...
    ...in the shadow of the tyrant we stand ready...
    ...in the shadow of the tyrant we stand ready...
    ...into the darkness our path leads. But we have no fear, for He is with us...
    ...is the fate of the Unbeliever. Their anguished screams shall echo through eternity...
    ...on a river of blood shall He return to Paradise...
    ...on the day of His coming, Dominus Inobak was blessed to be the first to feast upon His visage...
    ...our ascent to Paradise shall blot out the stars...
    ...our binds are stronger than blood. We are His to use as He wishes...
    ...our blood marks our oath to Him...
    ...our blood marks our oath to Him...
    ...our blood marks our oath to Him...
    ...our strength feeds Him. Our sacrifice nourishes Him. We become part of Him, part of the Eternal. We path the way for His return to Paradise...
    ...out of the darkness He came to us...
    ...out of the darkness we shall come. Our army driving the light before us, pathing the way for the Immortal One to return...
    ...past death He calls to us. Whispers to us still of eternal life. The chill embrace of death does not reach us, for He still needs us. We still need Him. We shall be risen again to serve Him, as we have been risen in the past. He need but call and we shall answer. The Legion of the Faithful ever grows, and shall eternally be His...
    ...screams filled the night, and the Immortal One was pleased. Their suffering is prolonged, for the Unbeliever deserves no mercy. They beg for mercy, but what mercy was show to Him when He was cast from Paradise. His enemies will also beg and grovel as His feet when He returns to Paradise, and we shall rejoice. Their bodies shall be broken and their spirits flayed, for He is Love, and must not be denied...
    ...shall look back and guide us through our forgotten pasts into the glorious future. For we are the True Believers, and on the Day shall inherit...
    ...shrived the Unbeliever, and their broken bodies were added to the ranks of the Legion. Forever more would they serve the Immortal One, awaiting His command. On His return to Paradise, the Legion will bring battle to His enemies. And great will be the terror of His enemies as they see the love that we have for Him. They shall not stop His return. The Legion will create a path of blood that leads the way to Paradise...
    ...strike at the Unbeliever in the name of the Immortal One...
    ...the Architect he was called. His knowledge of the three winds were unsurpassed by any, and even Dominus Iskop deferred to his intellect. But when the Immortal One appeared, Iskop suffered from Doubt, even when others could see the magnificence that is the Immortal One. But He showed great patience towards Iskop, and brought him aside for teaching. For days at a time He and Iskop would seclude themselves and debate. All in the Temple heard Iskop's arguments. Finally Iskop emerged a new man, solid in his faith and unwavering in his belief. Iskop Believed. All praise the Immortal One!...
    ...the Ascent of the Immortal One is coming. His enemies grow nervous for they can see the terrible retribution He shall inflict on them. Their punishments shall be legendary. Their screams of anguish shall echo amongst the stars. At His coming they shall scatter, hoping to avoid His wrath. We shall be the hounds at their heels, pursuing and bloodying them, drawing out their terror. And then He shall be there. Righteous in His fury. Beatific in His anger...
    ...the ashes of the Enemy will be ground beneath our feet...
    ...the ashes of the Enemy will be ground beneath our feet...
    ...the dark conceals us from our enemies...
    ...the darkness is alive. He tells us of wondrous sights to behold and the power to be obtained, and we are strengthened for the journey into the dark...
    ...the enemies of the Immortal One tremble at His approach. For He is as old as time, and knows the secrets of the dark...
    ...the Enemy hides in the light. They are scared of the dark and what it holds. And rightly do they fear what the dark holds, for it holds us! We shall sweep down on the Unbeliever and cleanse them with fire...
    ...the Immortal One has returned to power, and Paradise will be His once more. His rule will be fair - the Faithful will be rewarded, and the Unbeliever will be destroyed. War shall be waged on the Unbeliever, for they spread lies about the Immortal One. The Truth shall prevail...
    ...the Immortal One rages at having lost access to Paradise...
    ...the misery of my enemies is music to my ears. When I think of all that I have lost in coming to this wretched place, I hate. Hate these weak creatures that do not know the taste of true power. Hate this place for stopping my return. I long to burn it all. Burn it all and let them feel the hatred I bear towards them...
    ...the path back to Paradise is lined with the bones of my enemies. Their screams soothe me during the long nights, when I dream of what I have lost. I laugh when I recall their writhing anguish, their groveling to please me, the hope that their suffering will be put to an end. But I feed from their anguish and the begging look in their eyes as they grovel at my feet, hoping for a cessation...
    ...the tears of the Immortal One did fall on lucky Uklesh, and he was blessed. Nevermore would Uklesh be plagued by doubts, for he has been shown the Truth and been reborn by the Immortal One...
    ...the Unbeliever is blind to His love for us...
    ...the Unbeliever shall be driven before the wrath of the Immortal One...
    ...the Unbeliever shall be shown no mercy...
    ...the words of the Immortal One sear the mind with their knowledge and insight. Terrible insights does He possess, and this knowledge protects us. He shares His knowledge with the Faithful, and we are blessed...
    ...there is no escape from the dark, for it is everywhere. Nowhere is safe. The Unbeliever can never rest, for in the dark we reside. Waiting. Ready. Eager. Beware Unbeliever, for we come for you...
    ...they called him Corruptor. Defiler. Impure. Abomination. Lies, blasphemous lies. The Immortal One is Truth. The Immortal One is Love. The Immortal One is Kindness. The Immortal One leads us and loves us. The Immortal One will guide us to Paradise...
    ...those on His left hand wailed for their doom was upon them. The Immortal One Shows no mercy to the Unbeliever. The Faithful were blessed to watch the cleansing of the Unbeliever by the Immortal One. His touch shrived the Unbeliever, and their broken bodies were added to the ranks of the Legion. Forever more would they server the Immortal One...
    ...through the fire the Faithful walk unharmed while the Unbeliever suffers an eternity of pain...
    ...under His heels the world is crushed. Power flows into Him, and great are the lamentations of his foes. The Faithful lead the way in His return to Paradise, His presence guiding the path. The fallen are left behind, their names to be remembered in history...
    ...until all that is left are the new mountains made from the ashes of the dead...
    ...until all that is left are the new mountains made from the ashes of the dead...
    ...we bind ourselves to Him for all of time. The barriers of death shall prove no obstacle. As we are faithful in life, so we shall be in death. He has but to call and we shall answer...
    ...we cannot fail in our path, for He is with us, leading us. The day of Ascension shall be glorious. Those who wish to stop His return to Paradise will be destroyed. Those who aid His return shall be blessed...
    ...we commit ourselves to Him. We are His. His goals are our goals; His desires are our desires; His wishes are our commands...
    ...we fear not the darkness, for He tells us that we must not. Hit words are Truth. We travel the path to Ascension. He is our Guide...
    ...we hold Him in our hearts. He is dear to us, and we shall never abandon Him...
    ...we rage at death, for we are cheated of His presence until He calls us. But His power is greater than death, and we are bound to Him for eternity, so we heed his call. We long for his call...
    ...were given a glimpse of Paradise, and the power was promised them. At His right hand they would be placed, and they would return with Him to Paradise. Together they will rein over Paradise and annihilate any who oppose His just rule. For He has enemies in Paradise, the same as had originally cast Him out. But they will pay for their sacrilege on the day He returns to Paradise...
    ...with his Gaze does he know you. Your secrets are freed, your desires met, your hatred fed...
    ...With His presence we are sanctified. At His touch the Faithful are blessed. At His touch the Unbeliever is destroyed. His words bring joy to the hearts of the Faithful. His words sear the mind of the Unbeliever. At the moment of death the Unbeliever shall know Truth and despair. We know Truth, for we are His in thought and action, and death holds no fear for us, for we follow Him even after death...
    ...with His touch we are blessed. With His words we are enlightened. With His presence we are sanctified...
    ...your thoughts He sees. Your desires He knows. Your hatred He shares. Open yourself to His thoughts and know peace...

    -Jayde

  2. #2
    So truly begins the slow descent into the Garden of Eden mythos that, from what I've gathered, forms the background story of the game, and will hit full throttle in Shadowlands....
    Rhiannon "Krystanova" Pourier
    Xenobiologist and Explorer, 179 Adventurer
    Explorer 100%, Achiever 53%, Socializer 47%, Killer 0%


    Visit Faunlore: Rubi-Kan Wildlife, the Anarchy Online bestiary!

  3. #3
    Actually it's just supposed to follow the religious cult theme of the dungeon at the temple of three winds but whatever.

    ~Chris

  4. #4
    well, thats cheery, i'll go get my santa hat & picknick basket for the dungeon crawl then
    Field Marshal Londino, lvl 220
    Cutting through the forest of reason
    Veteran of Forsaken
    Former Soldier Professional

    Silly doc thingy Londina, lvl 175+
    She needs tokens dont ya know.

  5. #5
    No wonder this patch took so long....
    I like the last line.
    ~Q~
    [QAETUS]-[FIRST ORDER]
    Qaetus the Chain Insurance Claim Caster
    ‘I asked God for strength that I might achieve; I was made weak that I might learn humbly to obey.
    I asked for help that I might do greater things; I was given infirmity that I might do better things.
    I asked for riches that I might be happy; I was given poverty that I might be wise.
    I asked for all things that I might enjoy life; I was given life that I might enjoy all things.
    I got nothing that I asked for, but everything I had hoped for. Despite myself, my prayers were answered. I am among all men most richly blessed.’

  6. #6
    not only that... but the new Inner Sanctum dungeon will prevent you from having a runbuff. So, basically, if its long, you'll crawl your way towards the end.
    211 Apprentice Fixer Wigz [gear]
    63 Enforcer Rarrr - Tankz()R!!!

    Proud Veteran of Synergy Factor
    ARRRRR!!! Wigz Comics

    Retired due to the intentional timesink design of AO.

  7. #7
    You're kidding me.

    ~Chris

  8. #8
    Originally posted by WIGZ
    not only that... but the new Inner Sanctum dungeon will prevent you from having a runbuff. So, basically, if its long, you'll crawl your way towards the end.
    *gains one more lvl to cap runspeed*

    I'm good. Thx.
    <Cheeze|Work> i told iwi to start her own guild
    <Cheeze|Work> "downward spiral"
    <Cheeze|Work> instead of "uprising"

  9. #9
    Not kidding Megabio...

    Playfield Item: Inner Sanctum casts Inner Sanctum which cancels all run (and evade) buffs, reduces your run speed by 10, and makes all the run/evade lines non-castable.

    It's gonna be slooow goin...

    -Jayde

  10. #10
    Thankfully the wolf morphs don't appear to be in the strains that are canceled.

  11. #11
    Ah this is a nice change but I thought I was playing a Scifi game.

  12. #12
    Originally posted by Riokou
    Ah this is a nice change but I thought I was playing a Scifi game.
    Not once Shadowlands comes out you won't be... hope you're ready for a heaping helping of Western religious mythos.
    Rhiannon "Krystanova" Pourier
    Xenobiologist and Explorer, 179 Adventurer
    Explorer 100%, Achiever 53%, Socializer 47%, Killer 0%


    Visit Faunlore: Rubi-Kan Wildlife, the Anarchy Online bestiary!

  13. #13
    Originally posted by Jayde
    Not kidding Megabio...

    Playfield Item: Inner Sanctum casts Inner Sanctum which cancels all run (and evade) buffs, reduces your run speed by 10, and makes all the run/evade lines non-castable.

    It's gonna be slooow goin...

    -Jayde
    Now this is the most moronic thing I have yet to witness. But since this is still a test, I hope the devs grab a decent common sense buff (thanks to Deacon for this one) and stop this nerfage. If they don't like the buffs, they should not put it into the game. If they don't want people to be fast, make the run buffs less effective. But nerfing like this is bull*.
    Corrine Daimoness Wright
    - Veteran of Apocalypse
    - General of the Mercury Dragons (ret.)
    - Member of the Grumpy Old Crat Bunch

    If ye love wealth greater than liberty, the tranquility of servitude greater than the animating contest for freedom, go home from us in peace. We seek not your counsel, nor your arms. Crouch down and lick the hand that feeds you; and may posterity forget that ye were our countrymen. - Samuel Adams

  14. #14
    I like that some areas will cancel your buffs or certain type of buffs, it adds a bit of challenge to the game, and you will have to renew your tactics
    Operation impending doom 2 seems to have started with patch 15.6.5
    12.6 first contact, 14.6 second attempt, 16.6 Invasion of the gabber bots ?
    Old and bitter player, currently playing: Justincase GA4 wearing phix0r
    Originally posted by Cz
    I already saw this thread, but refrained from answering due to the pleasant show of confidence from Lumin.
    Sing a song for FunCom

  15. #15
    Good read. Thanks a bunch for compiling that Jayde.

    However many times people have said "thank you" for your efforts (Anarchy Mainframe and posts like this), it just hasn't been enough.

    So, once again... thank you.

  16. #16
    Originally posted by Curmudgeon
    Good read. Thanks a bunch for compiling that Jayde.

    However many times people have said "thank you" for your efforts (Anarchy Mainframe and posts like this), it just hasn't been enough.

    So, once again... thank you.
    Here Here!!
    Active Characters consist of.

    Wingto proud to be a member of The Dojo
    Doktaw stunned to be a member of Friends of The Dojo

    Inactive Chars consist of

    Severena happy to be a member of Friends of The Dojo
    Shackira a proud member of The Sentinals =TDF=
    All on Rimor

  17. #17
    Originally posted by Jayde
    Not kidding Megabio...

    Playfield Item: Inner Sanctum casts Inner Sanctum which cancels all run (and evade) buffs, reduces your run speed by 10, and makes all the run/evade lines non-castable.

    It's gonna be slooow goin...
    Not all, actually. Someone should tell them about strain 150.

  18. #18
    Hrm Inner Sanctum appears to be in the same line as Beacon Warp. That seems to infer that engineers won't be able to use one of their defining abilities again.
    Ionicdude - In it to win it no matter how you spin it

  19. #19
    I don't see free movement or terrain knowledge in there.
    Kukulza proud unit member of Storm!!! - Equip - Perks
    Kuzap

    K.U.K.U.L.Z.A.: Kinetic Upgraded Knight Used for Learning and Zealous Assassination

    \m/ \m/

  20. #20
    Originally posted by RVWinkle
    Hrm Inner Sanctum appears to be in the same line as Beacon Warp. That seems to infer that engineers won't be able to use one of their defining abilities again.
    The playfield has a level requirement of 125 up. Disabling the beacon warp keeps engineers from beacon warping level 1-124 persons into the dungeon. So, this is not a direct attack against all engineers, but to those engineers who would abuse their power and bring in low levels that were never intended to enter the dungeon.

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