Happy Holidays!
Twas the naht afore Christmas
and all through the trailer,
not a creature wuz stirrin'.
Not even Old Yaller.
The stockin's wuz hung
by the gunrack with care,
in hopes that the fat guy
would fill'em with beer.
The chill'ins wuz nuzzled
all snug in thar beds,
while visions of possum pie
done dance in thar haids.
Ma wuz wearin' her tube top,
and just a-brushin' her tooth,
when all of a sudden,
somethin' fell on the roof!
I heared a small creak,
then th shatter of glass -
Santa dropped through the skylight
and fell straight on his, uhmm... butt.
* THUMP *
He said not a word,
but got straight to his work.
All a cussin' and belchin'
like some drunken jerk.
He gave us all presents
that filled us with glee,
all purtily wrapped
and "As seen on TV."
He grabbed hold o' his beer gut
and mightily farted,
then back up the skylight
he quickly departed.
As his pick-up flew off,
he shouted out clear:
"Merry Christmas, my fellas -
I'll see y'all next year!"
Christmas stories always kinda warm yer heart, don't they? ^_^
