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Thread: the most abundant things in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity

  1. #41
    Oh boy... arrived to work, bored to my bones and I saw this thread... maaan! Had hundreds of those... "plzzzzzzzzzzz gimme gimme gimme <insert numbers>k cash, I need <insert random item name>."

    What else, well been mistaken as Trader from time to time but that's not been much of a deal... well once when I teamed and we've been running a mission for an hour or 2. Givin' NCUs and all the usual stuffs you give. Suddenly a member asks how much I'm able to wrangle him (everyone can lose connection with his/her brain from time to time ). But nothing as hillarious as the posts I've read here above...

  2. #42
    You're a fixer and you can't wrangle? What a n00b.
    Originally posted by Whaambulance
    Hi.

    This is singlehandedly the stupidest post I have EVER read on these forums. Congradulations.
    'Balancing' Nanos Will Remain Imbalanced Vs. Old Nanos - Because We Said So!

    O Gaute, Gaute! Wherefore art thou Gaute?
    Deny thy nerfs and refuse thy lame design decisions;
    Or, if thou wilt not, be but on the forums,
    And I'll no longer be a whiner.

  3. #43
    Originally posted by Evilspork
    You're a fixer and you can't wrangle? What a n00b.
    Phew... And I started to think that... might my Fixer be gimped there for a while

  4. #44
    d00d: can you wrangle +19?
    me: i can do +20
    d00d: k thx
    [after the 7th expertise]
    d00d: stop
    [i continue]
    d00d: stop
    [somewhere between psymod and biomet expertise]
    me: you are out of ncu. i can't finish wrangle.
    [blank, silent stare]
    me: 50k plz

  5. #45
    Originally posted by hashy
    d00d: can you wrangle +19?
    me: i can do +20
    d00d: k thx
    [after the 7th expertise]
    d00d: stop
    [i continue]
    d00d: stop
    [somewhere between psymod and biomet expertise]
    me: you are out of ncu. i can't finish wrangle.
    [blank, silent stare]
    me: 50k plz
    Originally posted by Slyyk
    The second and most favorite is the level 5 guy that asked for 10k to buy nanos and armor. This was shortly after the tradeskill section was added to shops. I told him to jump off the top railing 3 times and I would give it to him. He went up and wasn't able to clear the railing so I gave him a runbuff. Off he goes, 1, 2, and on the 3rd jump proceeds to die messily on the floor. I never heard from him again.
    **** I love you guys

    This is the best stuff I've read in a long, long time.

    Those are just so sick and twisted...I love it!

    On a side note, did you know ***** is censored? (see above)

    edit: jeez...holy censor..."Oh My *Freakin* God" then, better? =P
    Last edited by Stratah; Oct 30th, 2002 at 12:27:21.
    -=STRATAH=-

    TFC coup co-conspirator
    Member of The Mocker's Naked, Co-ed, Full contact, Drunken, Synchronized Blitzing Team

    -=The Mockers=-

  6. #46
    ROFLMAO Great work guys. I personally use YY's also he also has a buffing policy

    Layartic's Buffing Policy:
    Hello %t, to be reading this you've undoubtedly asked for a buff. While I do get satisfaction from helping others, I am not the BBI Buff-o-matic(tm), the Manex Percepathon-30000(tm), or the SecuTek My Personal Gridspace (tm).
    Now, I know what you're asking... How does this impact you?
    Well, to clear things up, let me state the requirements you must now meet to be considered for buffing by me. You must meet at least one of the requirements, sometimes two... it is up to my discretion as to which requirement you must meet.
    Without further addo:
    1. You may be green or higher. By green, I mean, you must be within our ability to team. If you are on the cusp and grey - too bad - unless we're teamed.
    2. You may have saved my life, been a good teammate, shown intelligence, proven to be a worthy ally, and I must know your main VERY well for you to ask for a buff on an alt. I may ask for proof of who you are.
    3. You may be a fixer.
    4. You may offer highest skill req on the nano * 100 credits * level differential between you and me. For instance, if you asked for gridspace freedom, the highest skill is 775, and there was a 100 level difference between us:
    now it would be 775 * 100 *100 or 7.75M credits for this nano to be cast one time. Omnis add a 50% surcharge. I will not buff lower QL buffs than what I use.
    5. You may be in my guild.
    This policy may change without notice.
    Thank you, and have a nice day.
    - The management.


    I don't get to break it out too often except for those really annoying persons, but when I do it feels sooooo good!!!
    Layartic - I have no fear of falling but I hate hitting the ground!!
    Sunebam - What you want me to heal too!!??
    Shatterstarr - Just kinda relaxing to let your pets work!

    And a few other toons of no notable mention yet

  7. #47
    Teuf's is my new favorite, though.

    "When you target me, does it say Teufeldieb or Buff-B***h?"

    ***s manually added so that meaning is clear, without offending anyone. I save the offending for when it really counts, like when we're making fun of Baby Jesus.
    Gunned down the young. Now old, crotchety, and back.

  8. #48
    I'm not a fixer but I'm bored at work and need to share my stories.

    In a team mission about a month or so ago a soldier in the group kept opening chests and getting blinded and he commented "I seem to crit more when blinded!". So as a NT I proceeded to chain-blind myself during every fight and assure him blinds are actually a crit buff added recently to fix NTs. He bought it and for the rest of the mission he was asking me for a blind.

  9. #49
    yes that is my new saying.... but the ones that piss me off are the ones that come up and ask:


    n00b: NCU, HoT, speed plz. I am going to the arena and i am omni.
    me: when you clicked me does it say Teufeldieb, or buff bi*ch?
    We are not racist, religious, violent, elitist or criminal. We are the sworn enemy of injustice and those who warp laws into justification for the corrupt. We are the freaks in your school, office, or church. We are the ones who do not sit idly by, or turn a blind eye to injustice in any form. We are vigilantes, hackers, freejackers, spies, and friends. We are sick of the current corpora-political trend and seek to ensure that infringements on freedom do not go unnoticed. We are Fixers!

    Freshman Pete "Teufeldieb" Freiman - Retired Due to Lack of Content for Fixers in SL

    Samuel "Pokett" Adams - Self Healing Tank

  10. #50
    This thread is just good to let it be this far down in the "new" posts list

  11. #51
    This is so cool! Thanks all so much!

    A non-depressing thread! That I can relate to!

    (Still hate these long days at work....I prefer to play the game ingame, rather than on the boards....still, I do what I must.)

    Again, Thanks!!!
    I'm a fixer, I fix things....

    Gerry "Endarron" McClymonds
    RK-2 Fixer
    President, Project Eden

  12. #52
    my latest

    me appearing before a noob at the reclaim booth after a semi successful blitz, you know the ones where you grab the item and die!!

    nOOb: NCU buff plz!!!
    Me: can't I'm rezzing
    nOOb: Why not?
    Me: Because I'm rezzing
    nOOb: Run buff plz!!
    Me: Still rezzing!!!
    nOOb: *******!!
    Me: ok I'll buff you but meet my stipulation!
    nOOb: OK!!
    Me: buffing script see above
    nOOb: huh.... *******!
    Me: chuckles then rd's to my next blitz
    Layartic - I have no fear of falling but I hate hitting the ground!!
    Sunebam - What you want me to heal too!!??
    Shatterstarr - Just kinda relaxing to let your pets work!

    And a few other toons of no notable mention yet

  13. #53
    Really needed to bump this one, but since that would be considered spam.

    This scenario happened a few weeks back, while teaming with my Doc friend, and a unnamed fixer, among other classes.

    Fixer: Heal plz.
    Doc: Im healing you as fast as I can.
    Fixer: Heal faster plz, they are hitting me for almost 900+ everytime.
    Doc: WHAT.
    Me: What are you're evades like?
    Fixer: (now sitting on the floor after the fight) Maxed.
    Me: What armour are you useing?
    Fixer: I lendt my armour to a friend, Im useing this coat atm.
    ME: ... what ql is that coat.
    Fixer: Ohh its a crappy ql 60

    Sad thing about this story is that the fixer we teamed with was about lvl 110, think it was 106 but that doesnt really matter. and this was in a ql 189 mission.

    Gotta love those ebay toons, they put the Fun into funcom. Or something like that.

    Eka
    Run Buffed Fixers finish fast
    Devgodz on Amnra

  14. #54
    Originally posted by Ekasel
    Fixer: I lendt my armour to a friend, Im useing this coat atm.
    LMFAO! There's a REAL fixer.


    /G13
    pirates. with lasers.
    Are you having an argument on the internet, again?

    Gene13 - on a space odyssey since 2001
    XXX - N

    Some day your ship will come in, but you will be at the airport.

  15. #55
    I ask for a wrangle (very politely!!) recently and got a canned scripted response
    that involved a 1.5 million credit donation.

    At that very moment someone was begging ME for a run buff, I couldn't help but say
    Run Buff? That'll 1.5 million credits, please.
    Garfield Babump Houston - RK2 Clan Fixer, L 156
    Pasquale Raisins Silvestrini - RK1 Omni Fixer, L 81
    (No, I am not a recurring character on the Sopranos)
    [url=http://www.anarchy-online.com/character/bio/d/2/name/sanotrix]

  16. #56

    Humidity!

    During two different groups that I was part of last week, both Doctors kept asking me to cast Humidity on them.

  17. #57
    I ask for a wrangle (very politely!!) recently and got a canned scripted response
    that involved a 1.5 million credit donation.
    I think I met the same guy when I asked for a +37 wrangle with one of my low lvl toons.

    Trader: <long scripted message> I will do it for a donation of 1.5 mill
    Me: Sure, wrangle me baby and I'll cash you.
    Trader wrangles me
    Me: I cant seem to put a decimal in the credits field so I'll have to give you 2 instead.
    Trader: Sweet!
    I give him 2 credits.
    Trader: wtf!! 2 credits ? I said 1.5 mill!!
    Me: Mill ? whats that ?
    Trader: ...

    I got my wrangle, and 1 less potential friend
    Operation impending doom 2 seems to have started with patch 15.6.5
    12.6 first contact, 14.6 second attempt, 16.6 Invasion of the gabber bots ?
    Old and bitter player, currently playing: Justincase GA4 wearing phix0r
    Originally posted by Cz
    I already saw this thread, but refrained from answering due to the pleasant show of confidence from Lumin.
    Sing a song for FunCom

  18. #58
    Not so long ago while playing my NT..

    lvl 15 MA: can you make me implants ? I'll tip you 100k a piece.
    Me: Sure (im thinking its someones twink)
    lvl 15 MA: nice!
    Me: you can hand me the implants and clusters in bags, it will speed up the process.
    lvl 15 MA: clusters ?
    Me: Yes clusters, you have clusters right ?
    lvl 15 MA: yeah I think I have some from a mission I took, you want them ?
    Me: do you want those in your implants ?
    lvl 15 MA: No! I want MA implants.
    Me: uhm... ok..
    Me: do you got the implants ?
    lvl 15 MA: No rofl!! you are making them (actually he used some kind of jap smiley, im unable to reproduce those)
    At this point I asumed the guy to be a air theif.
    Me: eh ok.. 100k a piece ?
    lvl 15 MA: yes
    Me: ok wait here.
    lvl 15 MA: k
    I run into the basic implant shop and bought a complete set of ql 20 MA implants from the MA implant shop.
    Me: here you go.
    lvl 15 MA: damn that was quick.
    Me: yeah im one of the fastest there is
    lvl 15 MA: sweet, gonna load them now.
    Me: good luck!

    The guy paid me 100k a piece for implants he could have bought himself. I have no pitty for people with loads of credits that dont know how to spend them in a smart way.
    Operation impending doom 2 seems to have started with patch 15.6.5
    12.6 first contact, 14.6 second attempt, 16.6 Invasion of the gabber bots ?
    Old and bitter player, currently playing: Justincase GA4 wearing phix0r
    Originally posted by Cz
    I already saw this thread, but refrained from answering due to the pleasant show of confidence from Lumin.
    Sing a song for FunCom

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