Well you've heard the story of the pig who grew up with sheepdogs. But that's another story.
This is the story of Snarf, Rubi-Ka's lovable, adorable Atrox NT.
He is well known throughout the lands as being the self-proclaimed Mayor of Tir, slayer of the three headed nanodragon, head of the Society for the Utter Annhiliation of Omni-Tek (SFTUAOAT), JDaug Stalker, AE'er Extraordinaire, Member of the Outer Tir Knitting Club, head of the Modesty Organization of Rubi-Ka and and Keeper of the Chicken Tacos.
But what you don't know is where he comes from, and why he's here. You see, it's an interesting story. Unfortunately most of it is classified and his cover here on Rubi-Ka is at risk of being blown if the details were to be revealed now.
Snarf is not of Rubi-Ka. He comes from a little insignificant planet somewhere in the vicinity of Uranus (excuse me!). Yes, so insignificant that it took earthlings some 4,000 years to even notice it was there. This was the planet of Rubi-Ta.
Now Rubi-Ta is a fascinating place, you see. Filled with lovely little fjords and meadows, very scenic.. especially in the afternoons when the sun is low. "Sun near Uranus?!" you may be thinking... well, considering that Rubi-Ta is at the outer reaches of the solar system, the Rubi-tahitians constructed a huge black-light sun through temporal warp conduit space-time/matter folding techniques. Black, of course, so that it could not be seen by the other inhabitants of the solar system. This sun hung over the skies of Rubi-Ta, instantly spurring a massive global market for white t-shirts that almost collapsed the entire economy and made people point and laugh at each other's teeth.
So Snarf was born on Rubi-Ta. Unfortunately, one day on a little trip from Oobladee-Oobladah IV, he contracted an awful case of the flu. Wanting to get home as quick as possible, he stumbled up in his Atrox way to the pilot and asked nasally "Bake be boo Bubi-Ba bees!". The pilot, alarmed at the prospect of having to polish up on his culinary skills, decided instead to take this freakish looking Atrox back home.
The plane landed on Rubi-Ka, and Snarf, not realizing that this planet wasn't his (no fjords! he should have looked for the fjords!) stumbled out of the cruiser into downtown Tir, where he immediately claimed that he was mayor and stumbled around with an axe and a bootle of leet quality wine.
So that's the story of Snarf. There are other major bits and pieces that have been omitted (like 40 years worth), but we'll save them for another day.
Where will our hero go? Has he even realized yet that he is NOT on his home planet?
Stay tuned for the adventures of snarf!
Kewl
It was meant for the male (I think) CapnFallbaby.
